Joke #10117

What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space? Steer Wars.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal

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I was walking home last night when I noticed an old drunk staggering along the road. He passed a woman who was walking a young child. "Lady", said the drunk, "that's the ugliest kid I've ever seen. Damn, that is one ugly child!." As the drunk wandered off, the lady burst into tears. Just then, a mailman came to her rescue. "What's the matter, madam?" he asked. "I've just been horribly insulted" she sobbed. "There there," said the mailman, reaching into his pocket. "Dry your eyes with this tissue, and here's a banana for the chimp"
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has 60.08 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, food, kids, ugly
When is a lion not a lion? When he turns into his cage.
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has 39.78 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal
Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
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has 52.10 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: animal, car, Chuck Norris, time
If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have? Plenty of milk.
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has 59.51 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, math
Q: What's invisible and smells like carrots? A: Bunny farts!
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has 42.61 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
A hound dog lays in the yard and an old man in overalls sits on the porch. "Excuse me, sir, but does your dog bite?" a jogger asks. The old man looks over his newspaper and replies, "Nope." As soon as the jogger enters the yard, the dog begins snarling and growling, and then attacks the jogger's legs. As the jogger flails around in the yard, he yells, "I thought you said your dog didn't bite!" The old man mutters, "Ain't my dog."
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has 82.89 % from 335 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, life
What do you call a bull that runs into a threshing machine? Hamburger.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Chuck Norris once uppercut a horse and that is how the giraffe was created.
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has 52.38 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
A man walks into his house with a duck under his arm. He walks up to his wife with it and says, "This is the pig I've been f*cking'." His wife says, "That's a duck." He quickly replies, "I wasn't talking to you."
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has 63.17 % from 178 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, wife
According to leading scientists, the deadliest animal on the planet is the Bearded Norris.
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has 39.64 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, science