When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror nothing appears. There can never be a second Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can drive to the moon... on foot.
I had an idea once, and a light bulb appeared over my head. Chuck Norris had an idea, and the sun was created.
Global warming is the result of Chuck Norris getting mad.
Cats are allergic to Chuck Norris.
Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.
Chuck Norris had a staring contest with a picture. And Won.
Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer. Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.
Chuck Norris has only one friend on Facebook: Pain.
Chuck Norris' Facebook status has a dislike button...nobody clicks it.
When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off