When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror nothing appears.
There can never be a second Chuck Norris.
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If Chuck Norris were a toy, you wouldn't play with him, he'll play with you.
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When Chuck Norris puts toast in the toaster it comes out bread.
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Kim Kardashian use to be 8 feet tall until Chuck Norris uppercut both her feet and that is why her ass is so big.
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Chuck Norris can in fact eat water.
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When Chuck Norris throws a throwing knife, the knife doesn't kill his victim, the force of the air did.
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Stevie Wonder was the last person to stare Chuck Norris directly in the eyes...
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Chuck Norris once planted a box of Cheerios in his yard, the result was a donut tree.
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Michael Jackson does moonwalk because he doesn't have time to turn and run away from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't battle, he just allows you to lose.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a stapler, he puts the paper between his fingers and they just stick.
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