Chuck Norris is so cool, ice cubes are jealous...
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Once Chuck Norris signed a cheque and the bank bounced.
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There's a medical term for those who willingly defy Chuck Norris... organ donors.
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Chuck Norris can check out books from the Library of Congress.
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Chuck Norris doesen't fly, gravity collapses around him.
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Chuck Norris does Rachel Marron's work.
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When Superman wants vacation time it has to be approved by Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris
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All of Chuck Norris's opinions can be proven with science.
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Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest.
Chuck Norris won by 5.
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Chuck Norris doesn't pick up his food to eat it.
He commands it to enter his mouth.
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