What's a rabbits favorite TV show?
Hoppy Days.
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Q:What did the polar bear say when they saw tourists in sleeping bags?
A:Mmmm, sandwiches!
Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog, Skipper, had recently died.
"You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad.
Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."
Susie stopped crying and asked, "What would God want with a dead dog?"
A lady is walking down the street to work and she sees a parrot in a pet store.
The parrot says to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly."
Well, the lady is furious!
And she storms past the store to her work.
On the way home she saw the same parrot in the window and the parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly."
Well, she was incredibly ticked now.
The next day see saw the same parrot and the parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly."
The lady was so ticked that she went into the store and said that she would sue the store and kill the bird.
The store manager said, "That's not good." and promised he wouldn't say it again.
When the lady walked past the store after work the parrot said to her, "Hey lady."
She paused and said, "Yes?" and the bird said, "You know."
Why do you never see zebras or antelopes at Victoria Station?
Because it's a mane-lion station.
What happened to the skunk who failed his swimming lesson?
He stank to the bottom of the pool.
Q. What did one frog say to another?
A. You're such a WART!
A man runs over a cat.
The cat’s address is on its collar so the man goes to apologise to the owner.
He knocks on the door and a little old lady answers.
The man says, ‘I’m so sorry.
I’ve just run over your cat.
Can I replace it?’
‘I don’t know,’ replies the old lady.
‘How are you at catching mice?’
Yo mama is so stupid, when I offered her animal crackers she said no thanks, I'm a vegetarian.
Q. Where do polar bears vote?
A. The North Poll.
A plowhorse, a honeybee and an old geezer are debating about which of them is the greatest.
The horse says, "I can plow all day long to provide food for dozens of people!"
"
The bee says, "I pollinate all the plants every year and make honey besides!"
The old geezer says...
(We're waiting...)
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