Joke #10383

Which rabbit is a famous comedian? Bob Hop.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal

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A guy walks into a bar with a four-foot crocodile on a leash, following him like a dog. The barman says gruffly: "No pets allowed here!" The guy says, "But this is a trained crocodile. See what it can do!" He sets the crocodile on a table and hits it on both ears. The crocodile opens its jaws wide. The guy unzips his pants, puts his pecker into the crocodile's jaws and hits the crocodile on the ears again. The crocodile closes its jaws leaving just one-inch space, not touching the man's pecker. Everybody in the bar is very impressed. To build upon it, the guy declares: "I give a hundred dollars to anyone who does it!" But everybody is afraid to - understandably, each would rather have an undamaged pecker than a hundred dollars. Finally, a man wearing a pink suit, with an earring in one ear, says in an effeminate voice: "I think I can do it!" Everybody admires him, "What a brave man you are!" The man continues, to the guy: "Just don't hit me so hard on the ears!"
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has 71.52 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, dirty, money, sex
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on top of a cliff. A magical bird flies to them and tells them that each one of them can jump off the cliff and wish to be one thing to fly away on. They will become that thing and can escape from their arduous situation. The redhead goes first. She jumps and says "eagle!". She turns into an eagle and flies away. The brunette jumps off and says,"hawk!" she turns into a hawk and flies away. The blonde takes a running start, trips on a rock as she nears the edge. "Oh crap!" she yells.
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has 60.65 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, ginger
How many skunks do you need to make a house really smelly? Just a phew.
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, fart
A man walks into his house with a duck under his arm. He walks up to his wife with it and says, "This is the pig I've been f*cking'." His wife says, "That's a duck." He quickly replies, "I wasn't talking to you."
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has 62.51 % from 166 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, wife
A man is walking through the wood and he meets a really ugly, big and a fat frog. The frog says: "Hello, prince if you kiss me, I will fulfill you one wish. You can wish whatever you want." The man says: "Ok, I will kiss you." He kisses the frog, he has told her his wish but nothing has happened. And the frog said: "Now you can see, such an old man and still believes in fairy tales."
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: age, animal, mean, stupid
The matchmaker approached a single woman and told her he had a husband for her. “I’m ashamed to bring this up,” he said, “but the man wants to be sure you are compatible in bed. He wants, he says, a sample.” The woman was shocked. “Such a thing you ask a Christian virtuous woman? Such a crude person would suggest such a thing? He must be a barnyard animal, not a gentleman.” The matchmaker, trying to earn a fee, said, “He’s a pragmatic, man. After all, to him it’s not a big deal… just a sample.” She thought a minute. “A pragmatic man, is he? So tell him I don’t give samples. I can give him 50 or 60 references, if he wants, though.
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has 54.49 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: animal, christian, dirty, husband, women
What do tigers wear in bed? Stripey pyjamas.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?
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has 26.98 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
How did the rabbit become a wrestling champion? It had a lot of hare pins.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
What is a zebra? 26 sizes larger than an ‘A’ bra.
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal