Q. What's green and red? A. A very mad frog.
An old lady was considering buying a squirrel fur coat. "But will it be all right in the rain?" she asked anxiously. "Oh certainly, ma am," said the manager smoothly. "After all, you've never seen a squirrel with an umbrella have you?"
What goes black white black white...? A penguin rolling down a hill! What's black and white and laughing? The penguin who pushed him!
What did the male squirrel say when the female attacked him... Get away from my nuts.
How do you get a hundred cows in a barn? You hang up a bingo sign!
Q. Why did the ant fall off the toilet seat? A. Because he was pissed off!
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? a lickalotapus.
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A.A dog is always happy to see you B.A dog only takes a couple of months to train.
Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast. They taste like chicken.
What is the most important use for cowhide? To hold the cow together.
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales? He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.