Joke #1040

Q. What's green and red? A. A very mad frog.
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An old lady was considering buying a squirrel fur coat. "But will it be all right in the rain?" she asked anxiously. "Oh certainly, ma am," said the manager smoothly. "After all, you've never seen a squirrel with an umbrella have you?"
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What goes black white black white...? A penguin rolling down a hill! What's black and white and laughing? The penguin who pushed him!
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What did the male squirrel say when the female attacked him... Get away from my nuts.
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How do you get a hundred cows in a barn? You hang up a bingo sign!
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Q. Why did the ant fall off the toilet seat? A. Because he was pissed off!
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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? a lickalotapus.
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What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A.A dog is always happy to see you B.A dog only takes a couple of months to train.
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Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast. They taste like chicken.
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What is the most important use for cowhide? To hold the cow together.
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Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales? He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
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