What's a teddy bears favourite pasta?
Tagliateddy.
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Baby Rabbit: "Mommy, where did I come from?"
Mother Rabbit: "I ll tell you when you re older."
Baby Rabbit: "Oh, Mommy, please, tell me now."
Mother Rabbit: "If you must know, you were pulled from a magician's hat."
Q: Why do Scotsmen wear kilts?
A: Sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.
Q. Why did the tiger loose at poker?
A. Because he was playing with a cheetah.
Why are there no zebras in Czech zoos?
Czechs and stripes don’t mix.
What dog can jump higher than a building?
Anydog, buildings can't jump!
Chuck Norris is the most feared predator on the planet.
That's why sharks have a Chuck Norris week.
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A Koala and a Prostitiute had just finished having sex, so the Prostitute said, "
All right, now give me my money!"
The Koala replied, "
Money, what for?" "
What for?", the Prostitute growled,
"Look up Prostitute in the dictionary and read what it says."
So the Koala looked up prostitute in the dictionary.
It said, "Prostitute- A woman who is paid to have sex."
" Okay," said the Koala, " now you look up Koala in the dictionary, and read what it says."
So the Prostitute looked up Koala in the dictionary.
It said, "Koala- A furry animal who eats bush, then leaves."
What did the judge say when the skunk was on trial?
Odour in court.
What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?
Steer Wars.