A man runs over a cat.
The cat’s address is on its collar so the man goes to apologise to the owner.
He knocks on the door and a little old lady answers.
The man says, ‘I’m so sorry.
I’ve just run over your cat.
Can I replace it?’
‘I don’t know,’ replies the old lady.
‘How are you at catching mice?’
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That tornado damage your cow barn any?
Dunno.
Haven't found the durn thing yet.
What did the mooron say when he saw the milk cartons in the grass?
"Hey! Look at the cow's nest!"
What do a rattlesnake and a soft penis have in common?
You can't f**k with either one.
Animal testing is a terrible idea;
they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.
What do you call a rabbit who works in a bakery?
A yeaster bunny.
Gemma:My dog doesn't have a nose.
Ortoise: How does he smell?
Gemma: Awful!
What do cows get when they are sick?
Hay Fever.
How can you tell when a skunk is angry?
It raises a stink.
Two Rabbits are running from a group of foxes.
They hide in a pile of hay, one rabbit says to the other one "Ok we can run for it or we can stay here and out number them."
And the other rabbit says, "We're going to run for it you idiot I'm your brother."