Q:What did the polar bear say when they saw tourists in sleeping bags?
A:Mmmm, sandwiches!
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Q: What is a thespian pony?
A: A little horse play
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.
Hercules strangled two snakes in his crib when he was a baby.
Chuck Norris strangled a grizzly bear moments after birth with his own umbilical cord.
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Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf.
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What happened to the lizard in the wizard's garden pond?
He had him newt-ered.
Q: Whats worse then finding half a worm in your apple?
A: The Holocaust.
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Q: Whats the Diffenence between kinky and perverted?
A1: Kinky is when you tickle your girl friends ass with a feather.
A2: Perverted is when you use the whole chicken...
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How do you hire a horse?
Put a brick under each hoof!
Mr. Bear and Mr. Rabbit live in the same forest, but they don't like each other.
One day, they come across a golden frog who offers them three wishes each.
Mr. Bear wishes that all the other bears in the forest were female. Mr. Rabbit wishes for a crash helmet.
Mr. Bear's second wish is that all the bears in the neighboring forests were female as well. Mr. Rabbit wishes for a motorcycle.
Mr. Bear's final wish is that all the other bears in the world were female, leaving him the only male bear in the world.
Mr. Rabbit revs the engine of his motorcycle and says, "I wish that Mr. Bear was gay!" and rides off.