Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life. When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
While learning CPR Chuck Norris actually brought the practice dummy to life.
Chuck Norris can experience a once in a life time occurrence... twice.
Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death, he beats it fair and square.
The chemical formula for the highly toxic cyanide ion is CN-. These are also Chuck Norris' initials. This is not a coincidence.
When Chuck Norris finishes his workout, the gym takes a break.
He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris is the meaning of life. Too bad he's also the meaning of death.
Chuck Norris can press "Pause" on reality.