Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
Chuck Norris was once shot. The bullet died.
Chuck Norris went an hour without killing... just to kill some time.
When you die on Earth you go to hell. When you die in hell you go to Chuck Norris' house.
You might kill two birds with one stone, but Chuck Norris kills two stones with one bird.
Chuck Norris kills 100% of germs.
Chuck Norris does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris. After 5 days of extreme pain...the snake died.