Mama bear to Papa bear: "Well... You might call it hibernating — I call it goofing off ."
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What did one slug say to another who had hit him and rushed off?
I ll get you next slime.
Cats took many thousands of years to domesticate humans.
Where do rabbits settle their legal disputes?
In a pellet court!
Why did the gag-writer turn green?
Cause the gag-writer was sick of writing frog jokes!
Q: Why is a sheep better than a woman?
A: A sheep doesn't care if you fuck her sister.
A mother was teaching his child about the side-effects of alcohol.
She gets two short glasses, filling one with water and the other with whiskey.
She says "I want you to see this."
She puts a worm in the water, and it swims around.
She puts a worm in the whiskey, and the worm dies immediately.
She then says, feeling that she has made her point clear, "what do you have to say about this experiment?"
The child responds by saying: "If I drink whiskey, I won't get worms!"
Where do milk shakes come from?
Nervous cows.
What do you call the reindeer with one eye higher than the other?
Isaiah.
Q: What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?
A: Laughing stock.