Joke #10778

What do you give a deer with an upset stomach? Elkaseltzer.
Vote: has 45.58 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A penguin's car breaks down and he has it towed to a repair shop. The mechanic tells him that he should have some information in about an hour. The penguin sees an ice cream shop across the street so he wanders over while the mechanic works. He finds the vanilla is the best ice cream he's ever eaten and he eats it with messy and gluttonous abandon getting it all over his face. He goes back to the mechanic's to check on his car. The mechanic informs him, "It looks as though you've blown a seal." "Oh, no." replies the penguin "It's just some ice cream."
Vote: has 39.50 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, car, mechanic, work
Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
Vote: has 69.50 % from 206 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, dirty, masturbation
Curiosity didn't kill the cat. Chuck Norris did.
Vote: has 73.44 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
Mother to little boy: ‘Stop pulling the cat’s tail.’ Boy: ‘I’m not. I’m just holding it. It’s the cat that’s doing the pulling.’
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Teacher: Students, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing? Class: "Brotherly love."
Vote: has 64.35 % from 72 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, love, school, teacher
What do you call a bull that runs into a threshing machine? Hamburger.
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food
A lion once put his head inside the mouth of Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 54.16 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
What do cows like to listen to? Moo-sic.
Vote: has 45.58 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, music
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Vote: has 80.72 % from 221 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
Two hunters from Moscow charter a small plane to fly them to Siberia to go bear hunting. On landing, the pilot says, "Remember, this plane can only fly with two hunters, one pilot, and ONE bear." The hunters go out and return with two bears. So the pilot says, "I told you ONE bear!" But the hunters point out that the previous year, on payment of an extra 100 rubles, the pilot had let them put two bears on board. After long discussion centering on the impossibility of the thing and the disgraceful degree of inflation, the pilot takes 200 rubles and with much pushing and shoving the hunters get aboard with the two bears. After struggling into the air and fitfully flying for about two hours, the plane gives up and plummets to the earth in a snowbank. Climbing out from under the snow and the bears, the hunters ask the pilot where he thinks they are. The pilot says, "About the same place where we crashed last year."
Vote: has 82.11 % from 136 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: airplane, animal, hunting, life, travel