Why is it difficult to identify horses from the back?
They re always switching their tails.
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Customer: "Waiter, do you serve crabs?"
Waiter: "Please sit down sir, we serve everyone."
Yo' Mama is so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct.
What is a frogs favorite time?
Leap Year!
What do reindeer say before telling you a joke?
This one will sleigh you.
Chuck Norris looked Medusa straight in the eyes, and laughed.
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How did the close race between the rabbit and the tortoise end?
It was won by a hare.
Little Johnny wanted to go to the zoo and pestered his parents for days.
Finally his mother talked his reluctant father into taking him.
"So how was it?" his mother asked when they returned home.
"Great," Little Johnny replied.
"Did you and daddy have a good time?" asked his mother.
"Yeah, daddy really liked it too," exclaimed Little Johnny, "especially when one of the animals came home at 30 to 1!"
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When should you feel sorry for a skunk?
When its spray pump is out of order!.
What do you if you're trapped inside a whale?
Run round and round till you're all pooped out!
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One day a man heard knocking at his door.
He opened the door only to see a small snail sitting there smiling.
The guy picked the snail up and threw it as far as he possibly could.
Three years later he heard knocking at the door again.
He opened the door to see the snail.
The snail said, "What the hell was that all about?"
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