What happened to the cannibal lion?
He had to swallow his pride!
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What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and sheep?
A wooly jumper.
What do you get if you cross a cow with a spaniel, a poodle, and a rooster?
A cockerpoodlemoo.
If it walks like a duck, talks lidek a duck, and smell like a duck but Chuck Norris says it's a girrafe. It's a damn girrafe!
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Q: What do you call a snake who works for the government?
A: A civil serpent.
What happens when you mix a frog with a bathtub scrubby-mit?
A rubbit!
Do you know the difference between a postal box and a monkey's arse?
Well if you don't know I will never ask you to post a letter for me.
What did the bunny say when he only had thistles to eat?
Thistle have to do.
Someone figured out my password.
Now I have to rename my dog.
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Dog Property Laws
1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If its in my mouth, it's mine.
3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.
4. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
5. If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
6. If its mine, it must never appear to be yours anyway.
7. If it just looks like mine, its mine.
8. If I saw it first, its mine.
9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
10. If its broken, its yours.