Joke #1508

Animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.
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has 34.87 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal

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First Caribou: Which bug does amazing motor cycle stunts? Second Caribou: Evel Boll Weevil.
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Bill Clinton and his driver were cruising along a country road one evening when a pig ran in front of the car. The driver tried to avoid it but couldn’t. The pig was killed. The President told his driver to go up to the farmhouse and explain to the owners what happened. About an hour later the driver staggers back to the car with his clothes in total disarray. He was holding a bottle of wine in one hand, a cigar in the other and smiling happily. “What happened?” asked the President. “Well,” the driver replied “the Farmer gave me the wine, his wife gave me the cigar, and their beautiful daughter made mad passionate love to me.” “My God, what did you tell them?” asked the President. The driver replied: “I’m Bill Clinton’s driver, and I just killed the pig.”
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What's a cow's favorite moosical note? Beef-flat!
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Q: Why do beavers spend a fortune on the Internet? A: They never want to log off.
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Chuck Norris uses live piranhas as bath toys.
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has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
Did you hear about the rabbit who got a job in a watch factory? Alike did was stand around making faces.
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What book did the rabbit take on vacation? One with a hoppy ending.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call a dog wearing ear muffs? Anything you want, he cant hear you.
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has 30.41 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and as he enters, notices a horse and the end of the bar with a sign on it. Out of curiosity, he approaches the bartender and asks what the deal is with the horse at the end of the bar. The bartender tells him: "The sign says if you can make the horse laugh you'll win $50. Take note though that hundreds of people have tried and no-one has been able to do it." "Get out the money," says Chuck," I'll be right back." So he walks to the end of the bar, whispers something into the horse's ear, and within seconds the horse is laughing hysterically. "That's amazing," said the bartender. "Tell you what, if you can make him cry I'll double your winnings." "Get out the money," says Chuck," I'll be right back." So Chuck walked again over to the horse, came back to the bartender 2 minutes later, and the horse was balling and sobbing like a baby. "Well," replied Chuck Norris, "First I told him a had a bigger d*ck than he did. Then I showed him."
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has 61.50 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, Chuck Norris
What’s the difference between goats and women?? Goats are always horney.
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has 39.32 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, women