Joke #11402

Q: Why did Santa's helper see the doctor? A: Because he had low "elf" esteem!
Vote:
has 52.77 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: doctor, elf, Santa

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

One particular Christmas season a long time ago Santa was ready for his Christmas run... but there were problems. Four of his elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones so Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule. Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mother was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more. When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where. More stress. Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys. So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot of whisky. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hid the bottle and there was nothing to drink. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the coffee pot and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw it was made from. Just then the doorbell rang and Santa cussed on his way to the door. He opened the door and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree. The angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas Santa. Isn't it just a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Isn't it just a lovely tree? Where would you like me to stick it?" Thus began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.
Vote:
has 79.23 % from 161 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Christmas, elf, Santa
Q: What is Father Christmas's tax status? A: Elf-employed.
Vote:
has 58.09 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: elf, Santa, tax
The pregnancy report of Santu’s wife came. Doctor said, "Oh, nothing to get excited, it was just the gas problem." Santu looks up at the sky towards the God and says, "Lord, What have you given me, a penis or an Air Pump."
Vote:
has 56.66 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: dirty, doctor, Santa, wife
Q: Why did the elves spell Christmas N-O-E? A: Because Santa had said, "No L!"
Vote:
has 56.65 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, elf, Santa
Santa rides in a sleigh. What do elves ride in? Mini vans!
Vote:
has 48.78 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: car, elf, Santa, travel
A three-year old walks over to a pregnant lady while waiting with his mother in a doctor’s surgery. “Why is your stomach so big?” – he asks. “I´m having a baby.” – she replies. “Is the baby in your stomach?” – he asks, with his big eyes. “Yes, it is.” – she says. “Is it a good baby?” – he asks, with a puzzled look. “Oh, yes. A really good baby.” – the lady replies. Shocked and surprised, he asks: “Then why did you eat him?”
Vote:
has 83.44 % from 1132 votes. More jokes about: baby, doctor, kids
Little Johnny's father asks him if he knows about the birds and the bees. "I don't want to know!" Little Johnny says, bursting into tears. Confused, his father asks what's wrong. "Oh, Dad," Little Johnny sobs, "first, there was no Santa Claus, then no Easter Bunny, and finally, no Tooth Fairy. If you're about to tell me that grownups don't really have sex, I've got nothing left to believe in."
Vote:
has 83.97 % from 597 votes. More jokes about: bird, dad, easter, little Johnny, Santa
One day a blond walks into a doctors office with both of her ears burnt. The doctor askes her what had happened. She says, "well... when I was ironing my work suit the phone rang and I mistakanly picked up the iron instead of the phone. "Well that explains one ear, but what about the other." "The bastard called again"
Vote:
has 85.47 % from 1706 votes. More jokes about: blonde, doctor, phone
Q: What's the difference between Santa Claus and Jews? A: Santa comes down the chimney.
Vote:
has 43.09 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, jewish, morbid, Santa
A guy and a girl meet at a bar. They get along so well that they decide to go to the girl’s place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands. He then takes off his pants and washes his hands. The girl watches him and says, “You must be a dentist” The guy, surprised, says “Yes…how did you figure that out?” The girl says, “Easy… you keep washing your hands." One thing led to another and they make love. After they were done, the girl says, “You must be a great dentist.” The guy, now with a boosted ego says, “Yes, I sure am a great dentist. How did you figure that out?” The girl says, “Easy… I didn’t feel a thing!”
Vote:
has 66.17 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: bar, dirty, doctor, love