Joke #11402

Q: Why did Santa's helper see the doctor? A: Because he had low "elf" esteem!
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has 49.95 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: doctor, elf, Santa

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One particular Christmas season a long time ago Santa was ready for his Christmas run... but there were problems. Four of his elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones so Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule. Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mother was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more. When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where. More stress. Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys. So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot of whisky. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hid the bottle and there was nothing to drink. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the coffee pot and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw it was made from. Just then the doorbell rang and Santa cussed on his way to the door. He opened the door and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree. The angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas Santa. Isn't it just a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Isn't it just a lovely tree? Where would you like me to stick it?" Thus began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.
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Q: What is Father Christmas's tax status? A: Elf-employed.
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has 56.57 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: elf, Santa, tax
Q: Why did the elves spell Christmas N-O-E? A: Because Santa had said, "No L!"
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has 53.69 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, elf, Santa
Santa rides in a sleigh. What do elves ride in? Mini vans!
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has 53.57 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: car, elf, Santa, travel
The pregnancy report of Santu’s wife came. Doctor said, "Oh, nothing to get excited, it was just the gas problem." Santu looks up at the sky towards the God and says, "Lord, What have you given me, a penis or an Air Pump."
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Santa Clause doesn't watch you sleep but Chuck Norris does.
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has 33.86 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Santa
One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, "Please send me a sister." Santa Clause wrote him back, "Ok, send me your mother."
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On a famous TV game show a blonde contestant needed only to answer one more question. One simple question stood between her and the Ł1.000 prize. "To be today's champion," the show's host smiled, "name two of Santa's reindeer." The blonde gave a sigh of relief because she had been given such an easy question. "Rudolph!" she said confidently, "and... Olive!" The studio audience started to applaud (as the little sign above their heads said to do) but the clapping quickly faded into mumbling, and the confused host replied, "Yes, we'll accept Rudolph, but could you please explain... 'Olive?!'" "You know," the woman circled her hand forward impatiently and began to sing, "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer - had a very shiny nose. And if you ever saw it, you would even say it glowed. *Olive,* the other reindeer..."
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has 48.79 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, game, money, Santa
This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad. He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!
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has 33.86 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, Chuck Norris, kids, Santa
Santa delivers to Chuck Norris' house first.
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has 29.66 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Santa