Q: What's the first thing elves learn in school?
A: The "elf"-abet!
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Santa rides in a sleigh.
What do elves ride in?
Mini vans!
Q: What kind of bread do elves make sandwiches with?
A: Why, shortbread of course!
Teacher: "What is seven Q plus three Q?"
Student: " Ten Q"Teacher: "You're Welcome."
Teacher: “You know you can’t sleep in my class.”
Boy: “I know. But maybe if you were just a little quieter, I could.”
Q: If athletes get athlete's foot, what do elves get?
A: Mistle-toes!
A Sunday school teacher was teaching her class about the difference between right and wrong.
"All right children, let's take another example," she said. "If I were to get into a man's pocket and take his wallet with all his money, what would I be?"
Little Johnny raises his hand, and with a confident smile, he blurts out, "You'd be his wife!"
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Q: What is Father Christmas's tax status?
A: Elf-employed.
Q: Why did Santa's helper see the doctor?
A: Because he had low "elf" esteem!
One elf said to another elf, "We had Grandma for Christmas dinner".
And the other elf said, "Really? We had turkey!"