Joke #11594

Q: How did the wanna-be-hipster die? A: Trying to cross the mainstream!

Q: What's a hipster's favorite profession? A: Mortician. All of his work is 6 feet underground.

Q: How do you drown a hipster? A: In the mainstream.

Every 5 seconds, somewhere in the world, someone dies of Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris gets younger by the kill.

One day, a blonde and her friend were walking through the park. Suddenly, the blonde's friend said, "Oh, look, a dead birdie!" The blonde looked up and said, "Where?"

I had a mate who was suicidal. He was really depressed, so I pushed him in front of a steam train. He was chuffed to bits.

Hipsters wear jackets in the summer, before it's cool.

If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, a hipster will buy it on vinyl.

Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. After all, he did kill Hitler.

A new soldier was on sentry duty at the main gate. His orders were clear. No car was to enter unless it had a special sticker on the windshield. A big Army car came up with a general seated in the back. The sentry said, "Halt, who goes there?" The chauffeur, a corporal, says, "General Wheeler." "I'm sorry, I can't let you through. You've got to have a sticker on the windshield." The general said, "Drive on!" The sentry said, "Hold it! You really can't come through. I have orders to shoot if you try driving in without a sticker." The general repeated, "I'm telling you, son, drive on!" The sentry walked up to the rear window and said, "General, I'm new at this. Do I shoot you or the driver?"