Q: Why did the hipster leave his oceanside mansion?
A: It was too current.
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Elmore walked into his favorite truck stop cafe and said to the owner, "Hey, Roy, you wanna take a chance on a raffle?"
"Whada ya win?"
"A million dollars!" said the redneck.
"You get a dollar a year for a million years."
"How much are they each?"
"Ten cents.
Two for a quarter.
Or three for half a dollar!"
Q: Why did the hipster float down the tributary?
A: Because the river was too mainstream.
I'm going trick or treating with my mum tonight.
It's the only time I can take her out as she's been dead for ten years.
Did you hear about the dentist who planted a garden?
A month later he was picking his teeth.
Q: What do you get when you combine a Starbucks and Yoga class?
A: I don't know, but there's probably a hipster close by.
Q: Why do hipsters love using the subway?
A: Because its underground.
Hipsters hate rivers.
Too mainstream.
Q: How many hipsters can you get into a phone booth?
A: One, any more and it would be too mainstream.
Hipsters wear jackets in the summer, before it's cool.
