I would make a science joke but all the good ones ARGON.
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Chuck Norris made Newton write 3 laws of physics just to break them... he was having a boring weekend.
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Your mama is so ugly she jumps and the gravity did not return.
Three statisticians are out hunting.
Suddenly, a deer appears 50 yards away.
The first statistician shoots and hits the tree 5 feet to the left.
The second statistician shoots and hits the tree 5 feet to the right.
The third statistician starts jumping up and down, yelling "We got him! We got him!"
Yo momma is so old, they use strands of her hair to carbon date dinosaur fossils.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a particle accelerator to collide atoms, he just smashes his fists together.
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Q: Why did the Atheist cross the road?
A: He thought there might be a street on the other side, but he wouldn't believe it until he tested his hypothesis.
Scientists believe that a giant meteor killed off the dinosaurs.
This is true, if you can consider Chuck Norris to be a giant meteor.
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"Yesterday, scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory, the scientists fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 100% of them gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became emotional, couldn't drive, and refused to apologize when wrong. No further testing is planned."
The First Law of Thermodynamics states:
Matter cannot be created nor destroyed... unless it meets Chuck Norris.
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