Joke #2538

Little Billy sits on his neighbour fence. After a while he asks surprised: Sir, how come your pig has only tree legs? Because I used only one leg for the stock.

Q: Did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic insomniac? A: He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog.

I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah; I thought, ''He's trying to pull a fast one''.

A man moved to a mountain top to get rid of the hustle and be alone. One day he heard a knock at the door and no one was there but then he looked down and there sat a snail and it said "it is quite cold out here can I come in?" The man shouted "NO why don't you all understand I want to be alone!" and he kicked the snail down the mountain. One year later there was a knock at the door and no one was there and then he looked down and there again sat a snail and it said, "What did you do that for?"

Q: What is a snake's favorite subject in school? A: Hissssstory.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Owls say. Owls say who? Yep, that they do.

"Why cant you play cards in the jungle?" "Because theres to many cheetahs."

What is a buttress? A female goat.

A man asks a farmer near a field, "Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train." The farmer says, "Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you'll even catch the 4:11 one."

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? a lickalotapus.

Have you read the book, "100-mile Horse Trek" Who wrote it? Major Bumsore.