Chuck Norris kissed a girl once.
She's still blushing, we call her Sun.
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Everybody loves Raymond. Except for Chuck Norris.
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Love is one way to get to a persons heart the other is Chuck Norris' fists.
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Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.
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Boy while kissing his girlfriend: "Thank u baby... For give me your chewing gum.."
Girl says, "This is not chewing gum my love. I’m suffering from cough!"
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The ground hog only pokes his head out to check for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris got a homerun in bowling.
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Did you hear about the man who ate nothing but oats every day?
He fell in love with the Grand National winner!
A man goes into a florist and says, "I want to buy some flowers for my girlfriend".
"Certainly sir", she responds, "and what in particular are you after"?
After some thought, the man answers, "a shag".
Wishing to prove to his wife that he loved her for more than sex, the young man bought her a
lovely bouquet of roses.
Despite his good intentions, however, the devoted husband received a
suspicious look when he handed her the flowers.
"I suppose," she said, "that now you expect
me to spend the weekend on my back with my legs spread."
"Why?" said the young man.
"Don't we have a vase?"
A man was invited for dinner at a friend's house.
Every time the host needed something, he preceded his request to his wife by calling her "My Love", "Darling", "Sweetheart", etc., etc.
His friend looked at him and said, "That's really nice after all of these years you've been married to keep saying those little pet names."
The host said, "Well, honestly, I've forgotten her name."
