Chuck Norris can gargle with honey.
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Some say that Chuck Norris is the Stig.
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Chuck Norris once shook a pirates hand.
That pirate is now known as Captain Hook
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When Chuck goes into outer space his head doesn't pop, space pops around his head!
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Chuck Norris' feminine side is manlier than the manliest man's manly side.
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When the President pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris's cell phone rings.
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Chuck Norris once went logging and took down a forest.
Then he came back for his axe.
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When Chuck Norris goes to the DMV, they take a number.
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Do you know why babys cry when they are born?
Because they know they are entering the world with chuck Norris in it.
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Chuck Norris once got careless and accidentally locked his drawer key inside his drawer, with a lock that needs the key to lock.
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Once, Chuck Norris told Nike to "just do it..." and it did.
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