She said "Gym or me".
Sometimes I miss her.
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Q: What is a banana's favorite gymnastic move?
A: The splits!
Question: What do you call a woman with two brain cells?
Answer: Pregnant.
I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits.
He said, "How flexible are you?"
I said, "I can't make Tuesdays or Thursdays."
In the dim and distant past, when life's tempo wasn't so fast, Grandma used to rock and knit, Crochet, tat and babysit.
When the kids were in a jam, they could always call on Gram.
However, today she's in the gym exercising to keep slim.
She's checking the web or surfing the net, sending some e-mail or placing a bet.
Nothing seems to stop or block her, now that Grandma's off her rocker.
Q: How are women and a hurricane alike?
A: When they arrive they're both wet and wild, when they leave, they take your house and your car.
"If women ruled the world," said my wife, "there'd be no wars."
"That's true," I replied. "Wars require strategy and logic."
What do you call a room full of women, half with PMS, half with yeast infections?
A whine and cheese party.
No time for gym?
Please tell me how you watch 3 hours of TV every night.
I wish this gym had a stationary bike built for two.