Joke #12551

Me: "I only smoke weed because of Cancer." Mom: "You don't have Cancer!" Me: "So it's working..."
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Two Tennessee Rednecks, Bubba and Jim Bob, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer. Bubba turns to Jim Bob and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the Community College, and sign up for some classes." Jim Bob thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave. The next day, Bubba goes down to the college and meets the Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: Math, English, History, and Logic. "Logic?" Bubba says. "What's that?" The dean says, "I'll show you. Do you own a weed-eater?" "Yeah." "Then logically speaking, because you own a weed-eater, I think that you would have a yard." "That's true, I do have a yard." "I'm not done, the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house." "Yes, I do have a house." "And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family." "I have a family." "I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife." "Yes, I do have a wife." "And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be a heterosexual." "I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of that because I have a weed-eater." Excited to take the class now, Bubba shakes the Dean's hand and leaves to go meet Jim Bob at the bar. He tells Jim Bob about his classes, how he is signed up for Math, English, History, and Logic. "Logic?" Jim Bob says, "What's that?" Bubba says, "I'll show you. Do you have a weed-eater?" "No." "Then you're a queer."
Vote: has 81.84 % from 166 votes. Send joke:
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My late grandfather always told me: "When there is a wind in your belly blow it out gently you feel a real comfort then look at the other's faces to see what are their reactions."
Vote: has 69.28 % from 42 votes. Send joke:
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Q: What do you call a family full of cancer patients? A: Jason Voorhees' relatives.
Vote: has 67.88 % from 20 votes. Send joke:
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I took my wife's family out for biscuits and tea. They weren't very happy about having to donate blood though.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:
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A father tells his son to stop jacking off. "You'll go blind if you do that too much!" he says. The son says "uh, I'm over here dad."
Vote: has 53.15 % from 46 votes. Send joke:
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Yo Momma is so fat… That she broke a branch in her family tree!
Vote: has 79.60 % from 901 votes. Send joke:
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Cannibal Son: Mom, I don't like my brother anymore. Cannibal Mother: You shut up and eat!
Vote: has 44.92 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
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Q: If there are two potheads in the back of a car, then who is driving? A: The cop!
Vote: has 60.56 % from 19 votes. Send joke:
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There are three moms. A Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde. They were all talking one day and the brunette says "Oh my gosh y'all I went through my daughter's purse the other day to get some gum, and I found an ounce of weed. I cannot believe she smokes weed" They comfort her, and the redhead says "Yeah, well I found a fake I. D. In my daughter's purse. I cannot believe she has one". So they all comfort her. Then the blonde says "That's nothing. I found a condom in my daughter's purse. I just cannot believe she has a penis"
Vote: has 77.05 % from 79 votes. Send joke:
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Q: Why don't you see any pot heads in elementary school? A: Because they're all in high school
Vote: has 64.88 % from 18 votes. Send joke:
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