Facebook is like a fridge, you keep checking it and nothing has changed.
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Facebook is like a fridge.
Even when u know there's nothing new going on, u still go on & check it every 10 minute.
When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook, you die.
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This guy gets a parrot but it's got a bad attitude and foul vocabulary.
He tries everything to change the bird's attitude and clean up its talk but nothing works.
Finally, in a moment of desperation, he puts the parrot in the freezer.
For a few moments he hears the bird squawking, kicking and screaming and then, suddenly, all is quiet.
He opens the freezer door.
The parrot steps out and says, "I'm sorry that I offended you with my language and actions. I ask for your forgiveness."
The guy's astounded at the bird's change in attitude and was about to ask what changed him when the parrot continued, "By the way, may I ask - what did the chicken do?"
Whoever said technology will replace paper has obviously never tried to wipe their butt with an iPad.
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Q: What's the difference between a freezer and a fag?
A: A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
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I wonder what Facebook employees do to waste their time at work?
Google+ is the gym of social networking.
We all join, but nobody actually uses it.
They say the surest way to a man's heart is through the stomach.
But personally, I find going through the ribcage a lot easier.
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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: It was escaping from K.F.C.
