Facebook is like a fridge.
Even when u know there's nothing new going on, u still go on & check it every 10 minute.
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Facebook is like a fridge, you keep checking it and nothing has changed.
Question: What’s the ideal breakfast setting?
Answer: You’re sitting at the kitchen table and your son is on the cover of the Wheaties box, your mistress is on the cover of Playboy, and your wife is on the back of a milk carton.
Not only CAN Chuck have his cake and eat it too, he WILL.
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A Detroit-area woman who was removed from a jury for commenting about the ongoing case on Facebook has a longer writing task ahead: a five-page essay about the constitutional right to a fair trial.
She responded, "Can I just get the answer from Wikipedia and send it to the inbox on your Facebook page instead?"
What does the cannibal do just after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his ass.
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I don't always go to the gym, but when I do, I make sure Facebook knows about it.
75% of women do not eat after 6... shots.
What is the difference between turkey and mother-in-law?
There is no difference: both are the best when they are cold on the table.
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Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar movie collection except for one. he's never gonna give you Up