Facebook is like a fridge. Even when u know there's nothing new going on, u still go on & check it every 10 minute.
Facebook is like a fridge, you keep checking it and nothing has changed.
We love Facebook but we hate the face of book.
I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.
Chuck Norris doesn't have a Facebook, he has a Fistbook... No one's his friend.
Someone figured out my password. Now I have to rename my dog.
Facebook is like a fridge. Every a few minutes you keep opening and closing it to see if there's anything good in it.
Chuck Norris can block Mark Zuckerberg's Facebook account.
Chuck Norris has his own protien powder. The ingriedients include: cocoa powder, stem cells, dodo egg protien, enriched uranium, LSD, and Vin Diesel.
Q: What do you get when you mix beans and onions? A: Tear gas.
At a restaurant, one of the customers notices that all of the waiters have two spoons in their vest pockets. A waiter explains, "We see that the most frequently dropped silverware is spoons, therefore we keep them for replacement." Then the customer notices a string hanging out of all the waiters' flies. "The string is for us to go to the bathroom," explains the waiter. "That way, when we pull it, it shoots and aims straight, and we don't need to use our hands." The customer asks, "Well, that's how you get it out, but how do you get it back in?" The waiter replies, "Well, that's another reason we carry the spoons."