Joke #1389

What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
Vote: has 39.90 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

My wife was dying. I was by her bedside. She said in a tired voice, "Theres something I must confess." "Shhh" I said, "theres nothing to confess. Everythings alright." "No I must die in peace. I had s*x with your brother, your best friend, his best friend and your father!" "I know," I whispered "Thats why i posion you, now close your eyes!"
Vote: has 71.43 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, men, wife
What should you give a man who has everything? A. A woman to show him how to work it. B. Penicillin.
Vote: has 26.16 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men, women, work
Did you hear about the man who got a vasectomy at Sears? Now every time he gets excited, the garage door goes up.
Vote: has 29.01 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
Q: How can you tell when a man is dead? A: He stays stiff for more than two minutes.
Vote: has 27.32 % from 5 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
The Perfect Man: - wakes up at 5 am everyday - exercises everyday - makes his own bed - cleans his room - works sincerely - does not touch alcohol - helps in the kitchen - does not indulge in night life - always punctual - prays daily - hits the bed at 9 pm sharp Such a perfect man can only be found in jail.
Vote: has 84.52 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
Q: What do you call a man who run a cross the road and roll in the dirt then run back across? A: A double dirty crosser.
Vote: has 60.56 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, men, travel
Q: When is the only time a guy can multi-task? A: When he's watching porn, masturbating, and keeping an eye on the door at the same time...
Vote: has 77.70 % from 76 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, masturbation, men, time
Why don't men like to drink coffee at work? It keeps them awake.
Vote: has 71.43 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men, work
What is a man's idea of helping with housework? Lifting his leg so you can vacuum.
Vote: has 50.45 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
This french guy he wants to learn English. So one day he goes to an airport to learn "take off". Then he goes to the zoo to learn "zebra". Then he goes to the hospital "baby" So one day he walks up too a hot girl on a beach in a bikini and he said "Take off zebra baby" (take off the bra baby).
Vote: has 53.58 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men