Joke #14062

Chuck Norris's tears can cure every type of cancer, the only problem is he never cried.
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has 35.73 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health, medical

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A man goes to the doctor with a long history of migraine headaches. When the doctor does his history and physical, he discovers that the poor guy has tried practically every therapy known to man for his migraines and STILL no improvement. "Listen," says the doc, "I have migraines, too and the advice I'm going to give you isn't really anything I learned in medical school, but it's advice that I've gotten from my own experience. When I have a migraine, I go home, get in a nice hot bathtub, and soak for a while. Then I have my wife sponge me off with the hottest water I can stand, especially around the forehead. This helps a little. Then I get out of the tub, take her into the bedroom, and even if my head is killing me, I force myself to have sex with her. Almost always, the headache is immediately gone. Now, give it a try, and come back and see me in six weeks." Six weeks later, the patient returns with a big grin. "Doc! I took our advice and it works! It REALLY WORKS! I've had migraines for 17 years and this is the FIRST time anyone has ever helped me!" "Well," says the physician, "I'm glad I could help." "By the way, Doc," the patient adds, "You have a REALLY nice house
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has 84.91 % from 432 votes. More jokes about: doctor, health, life, medical, work
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
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has 78.39 % from 550 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Chuck Norris, health
Chuck Norris was once tested for steroids. The results came back positive. When confronted with this information, Chuck Norris chuckled and said, "Of course, what do you think they make steroids from?"
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has 78.12 % from 245 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health
Q: What is the difference between a Vitamin and a Hormone? A: You can't hear a vitamin.
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has 75.62 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: health, insulting, medical, women
If you carefully examine your health insurance policy, you will see that there is no cover for "Chuck Norris related incidents".
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has 75.33 % from 153 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health
Q: What is the first symptom of AIDS? A: A sharp pain in the ass.
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has 73.58 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: health, medical, sex
A few guys tried to follow Chuck Norris during a light workout while he was vacationing in Hawaii. It's now called the Ironman Triathlon.
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has 73.31 % from 162 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, geography, gym, health
Q: Did you hear about the new Viagra eye-drops? A: Apparently they make you look hard.
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has 73.31 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: health, medical, viagra
Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly. One student said to his friend: "I'm sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that." The other student says: "No, I don't think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki Syndrome. He walks slowly and his legs are apart, just as we learned in class." Since they couldn't agree they decided to ask the old man. They approached him and one of the students said to him, "We're medical students and couldn't help but notice the way you walk, but we couldn't agree on the syndrome you might have. Could you tell us what it is?" The old man said, "I'll tell you, but first you tell me what you two fine medical students think." The first student said, "I think it's Peltry Syndrome." The old man said, "You thought - but you are wrong." The other student said, "I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome." The old man said, "You thought - but you are wrong." So they asked him, "Well, old timer, what do you have?" The old man said, "I thought it was gas - but I was wrong, too!"
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has 70.45 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: age, health, medical, old people, student
Q: Why is it that so many lawyers have broken noses? A: From chasing parked ambulances.
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has 70.18 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: health, lawyer, medical, stupid