Joke #1433

Friend pisses me off so I poked holes in his condom the night before he uses it. Three months later... my mom's pregnant.
Vote: has 71.99 % from 154 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Q: What's a horny pirate's worst nightmare? A: A sunken chest with no booty!
Vote: has 73.53 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, pirate
An old lady went to visit her dentist. When it was her turn she sat in the chair, lowered her underpants and raised her legs. The dentist said: "Excuse me; I 'm not a gynecologist." "I know," said the old lady "I want you to take my husband's teeth out."
Vote: has 76.91 % from 68 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dentist, dirty, husband, old people, sex
Three policemen are sitting in a car. Bored, as cards and domino make them sick already. On thinks of an idea: Guys, lets play golf. All we need is a stick, ball and a hole. I can arrange a stick, – one says. I will get a ball, - adds another. Guys, I’m not playing this dirty game, - says the third one.
Vote: has 58.51 % from 61 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty
What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? Make choking noises...
Vote: has 55.57 % from 41 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty
What is the difference between a joystick and a man's d**k? A joystick does its job.
Vote: has 44.67 % from 38 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, sex
A teenage girl come home from school and asks her mother, "Is it true what Rita just told me?" "What's that?" asks her mother. "That babies come out of the same place where boys put their penises?" said her daughter. "Yes it is dear!" replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and that she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter. "But then, when I have a baby," responded the teenager, "won't it knock my teeth out?"
Vote: has 83.87 % from 820 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, dirty, school
What did the Left Nut say to the right nut? Don't talk to the guy in the middle he's a d*ck!...
Vote: has 72.05 % from 51 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty
A man suffered a serious heart attack while shopping in a store. The store clerk called 911 when they saw him collapse to the floor. The paramedics rushed the man to the nearest hospital where he had emergency open heart bypass surgery. He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at the Catholic Hospital. A nun was seated next to his bed holding a clipboard loaded with several forms, and a pen. She asked him how he was going to pay for his treatment. “Do you have health insurance?” she asked. He replied in a raspy voice, “No health insurance.” The nun asked, “Do you have money in the bank?” He replied, “No money in the bank.” Do you have a relative who could help you with the payments?” asked the irritated nun. He said, “I only have a spinster sister, and she is a nun.” The nun became agitated and announced loudly, “Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns are married to God.” The patient replied, “Perfect. Send the bill to my brother-in-law.”
Vote: has 83.87 % from 166 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty
Q: Whats the difference between Niagara and Viagra? A: Niagara Falls.
Vote: has 62.14 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, viagra
I can teach you how to handle a cucumber.
Vote: has 31.96 % from 41 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, food