I'll have you saying, "My compliments to the chef" in no time!
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
What type of pussy does a priest get?
Nun.
A man walks into his house with a duck under his arm.
He walks up to his wife with it and says, "This is the pig I've been f*cking'."
His wife says, "That's a duck."
He quickly replies, "I wasn't talking to you."
Friend: Dude, I can't stop dreaming about my crush.
Me: Well imagine this... You're home alone, and your crush comes over to visit.
Friend: Ok I can see it...
Me: She walks into your room and you're just sitting there.
Friend: Uh-huh.. I'm likin' this.
Me: Ok. So she walks in front of you, takes her pants off.
She's not wearing any underwear.. And then she sits on you.
Friend: Oh-ho-hoo.. Whatta' naughty girl.
Me: Yeah, ok. Don't get dirty on me. So she's sitting on you.
And then... she starting shitting in you. Right then and there, you find out you're a toilet.
Friend: I hate you...
Vote:
Lesbians can also take Viagra.
They don't have to swallow it, they just let it melt in their tongues.
Undertaker to bereaved husband.
When did you 1st notice your wife was dead?
Well he replies, "The s*x was the same but the dishes were starting too pile up."
Q: What's the speed limit of sex?
A: 68. Because at 69 you have to turn around!
A girl was pampering a horse with her hand while watching display of the horses, suddenly she touched the genital of the horse.
The excited horse screeched, jumped and ran away very fast.
The horse’s guard faced the girl and said, “Ma’am please do the same to me, so I can run, chase and retrieve my boss’s horse.”
Q: What did the nut say to the bolt?
A: Screw me.
Q: How do u call an gay Indian guy.
A: Indi-anus
When Chuck Norris had a baby he was horny for the nurse and had a 70-inch long.
Vote: