Q: What do you call a Puerto Rican midget?
A: A spec.
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Similar jokes
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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob.
On the wall? Art.
On the floor? Matt.
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On the last day of kindergarten, all the children brought presents for their teacher.
The florist's son handed the teacher a gift.
She shook it, held it up and said, "I bet I know what it is - it's some flowers!"
"That's right!" shouted the little boy.
Then the candy store owner's daughter handed the teacher a gift.
She held it up, shook it and said. "I bet I know what it is - it's a box of candy!"
"That's right!" shouted the little girl.
The next gift was from the liquor store owner's son, Little Johnny.
The teacher held it up and saw that it was leaking.
She touched a drop with her finger and tasted it.
"Is it wine?" she asked. "No," Little Johnny answered.
The teacher touched another drop to her tongue.
"Is it champagne?" she asked.
"No," he answered.
Finally, the teacher said, "I give up. What is it?"
Little Johnny replied, "A puppy!"
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Q: Who is brave?
A: He who has diarrhea and wants to fart!
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What's funner then nailing bin Laden to a tree?
Feeding his lifeless corpse into a meat grinder.
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What do you if you're trapped inside a whale?
Run round and round till you're all pooped out!
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If you think you have shitty job, what if you were toilet paper!
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Why did the semen cross the road?
Because I wore the wrong sock today.
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Q: What do you call the sweat on your balls after having sex with your cousin?
A: Relative humidity.
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A mother is making a cake for her three sons when she accidentaly dropps some BB from the shelf into the batter.
She decides that it won't matter and continues to make the cake.
Later that day, her sons eat the cake and don't even notice the BBs.
The next day, when the mother is reading a magazine on the couch, one of her sons runs in saying, "Mom, mom, I pissed out a beebee!"
She says "That's okay, son. I accidentaly dropped some beebees into the cake batter. You'll be fine."
Five minutes later, one of the other sons, come running in and he says, "Mom, mom, I.."
But the mother cuts him off and she says, "I know, I know, you pissed out a beebee. I dropped it into the cake batter, but you'll be fine."
Then her last son runs in the room, and he says, "Mom, mom, I.."
And the mother cuts him off and says, "I know, I know, you pissed out a beebee. It's my fault for dropping it in the cake batter, but you'll be fine."
But then son says, "No, no, I was masturbating and I shot the dog!"
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It's a really hot day and this penguin is having car trouble, so he takes it into a garage.
The penguin asks, "How long will it be?"
The mechanic says, "Just a few minutes."
So the penguin decides to go get an ice cream at the grocery store across the street.
When the penguin gets there he climbs inside the big freezer door and starts to eat ice cream.
Three hours go by before the penguin looks at his watch and jumps out of the freezer and races back to the garage.
With ice cream all over his face and his stomach he says, "So, how's my car?"
The mechanic comes walking out wiping his hands on a rag and says, "Looks like you blew a seal."
The penguin says, "No, no, no, I was just eating ice cream."