Q: What do you call a Puerto Rican midget?
A: A spec.
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Similar jokes
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Q: What does an elephant use as tampon?
A: A sheep.
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Why doesnt a man eat out an 80 year old woman? Ever opened up a grilled cheese?
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Q: What's the difference between driving in the fog and eating pussy?
A: At least when you are eating pussy you can see the asshole in front of you.
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Why did President Clinton name his dog Buddy instead of Spot?
Because he didn't want people running around the White House saying, "come Spot, come Spot!"
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Q: How can you tell if a woman is wearing pantyhose?
A: Her ankles swell up when she farts.
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I have a green nose, three red mouths, and four purple ears.
What am I?
Ugly!
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Q: What is worse than ten dead people in one trashcan?
A: One dead person in ten trashcans!
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Q: Did you hear about the annoying midget who went to a nudist colony?
A: He kept getting in everyone's hair.
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One day God came to Adam to pass on some news.
"I've got some good news and some bad news," God said.
Adam looked at God and said, "Well, give me the good news first."
Smiling, God explained, "I've got two new organs for you. One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things and have intelligent conversations with Eve. The other organ I have for you is called a penis. It will allow you to reproduce your life form and populate this planet. Eve will be very happy that you now have this organ to give her children."
Adam, very excited, exclaimed, "These are great gifts. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?"
God looked upon Adam and said with great sorrow, "The bad news is that when I created you, I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time."
Then, God came to Eve to pass on some news too. "I've got some good news and some bad news," God said.
Eve looked at God and said, "Well, give me the good news first."
Smiling, God explained, "I've got two new organs for you. One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things and have intelligent conversations with Adam. The other organ I have for you is called a vagina. It will allow you to reproduce your now intelligent life form and populate this planet. Adam will be very happy that you now have this organ to give him children."
Eve, very excited, exclaimed, "These are great gifts you have given to me. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?"
God looked upon Eve and said with great sorrow, "The bad news is that when I created you, I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time. While you're bleeding through one of them every 28 days, the other will remain useless."
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Bob walks into a public bathroom and notices a guy with no arms standing next to a urinal.
As Bob takes care of his business, he wonders how the poor soul is going to take a leak.
Bob finishes and heads for the door, but figures he should ask the man if he needs help.
"Oh yes please!?" the man cries.
"You have a kind heart, sir," says the man with no arms.
But as Bob goes ahead, unzips the man, and pulls his willy out, he encounters all kinds of mold, red bumps, moles, scabs, scars, and other unpleasant-looking things.
The armless man asks Bob to kindly point it... then shake it, put it back and zip it.
So Bob, gathers his courage, shuts his eyes and does so.
"Thank you very much, sir!" says the armless man.
"No problem," says Bob "but what the hell is wrong with your penis?"
The guy pulls pulls his arms out of his shirt and says "I don't know, but I ain't touching it!"
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