Joke #8066

What do you call a masturbating cow? Beef Stroke-n-off
Vote: has 57.16 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, masturbation

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A mother is making a cake for her three sons when she accidentaly dropps some BB from the shelf into the batter. She decides that it won't matter and continues to make the cake. Later that day, her sons eat the cake and don't even notice the BBs. The next day, when the mother is reading a magazine on the couch, one of her sons runs in saying, "Mom, mom, I pissed out a beebee!" She says "That's okay, son. I accidentaly dropped some beebees into the cake batter. You'll be fine." Five minutes later, one of the other sons, come running in and he says, "Mom, mom, I.." But the mother cuts him off and she says, "I know, I know, you pissed out a beebee. I dropped it into the cake batter, but you'll be fine." Then her last son runs in the room, and he says, "Mom, mom, I.." And the mother cuts him off and says, "I know, I know, you pissed out a beebee. It's my fault for dropping it in the cake batter, but you'll be fine." But then son says, "No, no, I was masturbating and I shot the dog!"
Vote: has 75.66 % from 49 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, dog, food, masturbation
Q: What's the ultimate rejection? A: When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep.
Vote: has 72.72 % from 331 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, masturbation
A cowboy rides in the desert and comes upon a Native American lying naked with a hard-on. He asks, "What are you doing?" The naked man replies, "I'm finding out the time -- it is 12:15." The cowboy looks at his watch and thinks, "Wow, it really is 12:15." The cowboy continues and sees another Native American lying naked with a hard-on. He asks, "What are you doing?" The naked man replies, "I'm seeing what time it is -- it is 3:15." The cowboy looks at his watch and that is the correct time. The cowboy continues and finds a third Native American lying naked on the ground, masturbating. The cowboy asks what he's doing and he replies, "I'm winding my watch."
Vote: has 69.28 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: cowboy, disgusting, masturbation, time
Dan staggers into the shower. He notices that his d**k is bright orange. He feels normal, but he's concerned and goes to the doctor. After a thorough examination, the doctor says, "You seem to be fine and all of the tests are normal. Did you do anything out of the ordinary over the weekend?" Dan says, "No. All I did was stay home, watch porno movies and eat Cheetos."
Vote: has 58.56 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, masturbation
How is a soyburger like a dildo? They're both substitutes for meat.
Vote: has 52.93 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, masturbation
I met a girl who used masturbate to 2 girls 1 cup. And that kids, is how j met your mother.
Vote: has 24.08 % from 50 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, masturbation
"Mr. Ben, I am asking for your daughter's hand." "Why? I don't get it, don't you have a hand?" "I do sir, but I'm sick and tired with my own hand sir!"
Vote: has 75.92 % from 85 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, marriage, masturbation
Q: What is worse than waking up the morning after an orgy with pubic hair in your teeth? A: Waking up with a lump in your throat and a string hanging out of your mouth.
Vote: has 39.47 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
Q: What's the difference between a freezer and a fag? A: A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
Vote: has 51.00 % from 53 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart
Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator? A: "What are you shaking about, it's me she's going to eat."
Vote: has 83.18 % from 207 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, food, masturbation