Q: Why are jelly beans alot like the world?
A: Because everyone hates the black ones.
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Similar jokes
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My dad died on 9-11.
He was the best amateur bomber on Iraq's flight team.
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What's the last thing that went through Princess Diana's mind?
The dashboard.
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A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean.
The lawyer said "I'm here because my house burned down and everything I owned was destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for everything."
"That's quite a coincidence", said the engineer, "I'm here because my house and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance company also paid for everything."
The lawyer looked somewhat confused. "How do you start a flood?", he asked.
What is the difference between a fridge and a kid?
A fridge doesn't shout when you put your meat inside it.
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Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine.
I guess that was why several of us died of tuberculosis.
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Crocodiles are easy.
They try to kill and eat you.
People are harder.
Sometimes they pretend to be your friend first.
- Steve Irwin (1962 - 2006)
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How long does it take a black lady to shit?
About 9 months.
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What's the difference between a police officer and a bullet?
When a bullet kills someone else, you know it's been fired.
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Why do you unload a truck full of babies with a pitchfork?
So you can tell which ones are still alive.
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I had a mate who was suicidal.
He was really depressed, so I pushed him in front of a steam train.
He was chuffed to bits.
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