Joke #1569

Q: Why are jelly beans alot like the world? A: Because everyone hates the black ones.
Vote: has 30.36 % from 57 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

I was a little taken aback when I got my receipt from the funeral parlor, on the bottom of the receipt, after the bill, it read, "Thank you. Please come again."
Vote: has 83.05 % from 49 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, customer service, funeral
A cab driver reaches the pearly gates. St. Peter looks him up in his Big Book and tells him to pick up a gold staff and a silk robe and proceed into Heaven. Next in line is a preacher. St. Peter looks him up in his Big Book, furrows his brow and says, "OK, we'll let you in, but take that cloth robe and wooden staff." The preacher is shocked and replies, "But I am a man of the cloth. You gave that cab driver a gold staff and a silk robe. Surely I rate higher than a cabbie!" St. Peter responds matter-of-factly, "This is Heaven and up here, we are interested in results. When you preached, people slept. When the cabbie drove his taxi, people prayed."
Vote: has 85.21 % from 852 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, car, heaven, work
A blind man with a guide dog comes to a town square, takes the dog by the tail and starts whirling him around. „What on earth are you doing?!" asks a passer-by. The blind man replies, „Nothing, just looking around a bit."
Vote: has 65.80 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, black humor, dog
Steve lies dying, as Jack, his law partner of 40 years, sits at his bedside. "Jack, I've got to confess -- I've been sleeping with your wife for 30 years, I'm the father of your daughter, and I've been stealing from the firm for a decade." "Relax," says Jack, "and don't think another thing about it. I'm the one who put arsenic in your martini."
Vote: has 83.48 % from 625 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, death, money, wife
Death is God’s way of saying, ‘Hey, you’re not alive any more.’
Vote: has 43.55 % from 53 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor
Q: How do you make a cat go ‘woof’? A: Soak it in petrol, and set it on fire.
Vote: has 49.54 % from 40 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, cat
There is nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.
Vote: has 66.96 % from 35 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, death
Three gay men died, and were going to be cremated. Their lovers happened to be at the funeral home at the same time, and were discussing what they planned to do with the ashes. The first man said, "My Ryan loved to fly, so I'm going up in a plane and scatter his ashes in the sky." The second man said, "My Ross was a good fisherman, so I'm going to scatter his ashes in our favorite lake." The third man said, "My Jack was such a good lover, I think I'm going to dump his ashes in a pot of chili, so he can tear my ass up just one more time."
Vote: has 68.00 % from 172 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: airplane, black humor, death, funeral, gay
How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them.
Vote: has 50.44 % from 158 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, black humor, disgusting
Q: Why aren't there more famous skeletons? A: They're a bunch of no bodies!
Vote: has 65.80 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, celebrity, Halloween