Joke #1740

Q: What do you call a fake noodle? A: An Impasta
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has 46.18 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: kids

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There was a business man driving down this country road when he spotted a little boy that had a lemonade stand. It being hot and him being thirsty, he decided to stop. Once he got up to the little boy's stand, he noticed a sign that said "All you can drink 10 cents," and a single, very small glass. Well, he thought that it was an awful small glass, but since it was only 10 cents for all you can drink, he decided to get some anyway. He gave the boy a dime, and shot down the whole glass in one swig. He slapped the glass back onto the table and said, "fill 'er up." The kid replieds, "Sure thing, that'll be 10 cents." To this the business man said, "But your sign says all you can drink for a dime." "It is," the little boy replies, "That's all you can drink for a dime."
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has 70.73 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: business, kids, money
Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'" Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken." Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?" Mother: "Because we need the eggs."
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has 37.36 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal, kids
*Me when I turn 18* Parents: Do this. Me: Dobby has no master. Dobby is a free elf.
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has 56.05 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: kids
A:I have the perfect son. Q:Does he smoke? A:No, he doesn't. Q:Does he drink whiskey? A:No, he doesn't. Q:Does he ever come home late? A:No, he doesn't. Q:I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he? A:He will be six months old next Wednesday.
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has 84.10 % from 93 votes. More jokes about: age, alcohol, kids
Chuck Norris had six kids, they were called SEAL TEAM 6.
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has 41.89 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids, military
Teacher (on phone): "You say Michael has a cold and can't come to school today? To whom am I speaking?" Voice: "This is my father."
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has 77.37 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: dad, health, kids, teacher
Q: What did the adding machine say to the cashier? A: You can count on me.
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has 35.28 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: kids
It was at an amusement park on a brutally hot day when I saw a father with 2 kids. "Who’s enjoying the most?" I asked cheerfully. "I am" said one. "I am" said the second. "No," the father said "their mother is!"
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has 61.25 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: kids
It was graduation day and Mom was trying to take a picture of their son in a cap and gown, posed with his father. "Let’s try to make this look natural" she said. "Junior, put your arm around your dad’s shoulder." The father answered, "If you want it to look natural, why not have him put his hand in my pocket?"
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has 59.93 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: dad, graduation, kids
A lawyer, a priest, and a young boy were in a plane that was going to crash, yet they only had 2 parachutes. The lawyer proclaimed that since he was the smartest man on the plane, that he deserved to survive. He took a chute and jumped. The priest looks and the young boy, and reflecting back on his life, told the young boy to take the last parachute since he had already lived a wonderful and full life. The boy replied, "You can have the other chute because the smartest man on this plane just jumped out with my bookbag!"
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has 84.46 % from 232 votes. More jokes about: kids, lawyer, priest