Joke #1771

Q: What do you call a one-man quickie? A: A yankee.
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has 43.39 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: dirty

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Can you help me achieve a coronal mass ejection?
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has 15.49 % from 125 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A guy goes into confession and says to the priest, “Father, I’m 80 years old, widower, with 11 grandchildren. Last night I met two beautiful flight attendants. They took me home and I made love to both of them. Twice.” The priest says, “Well, my son, when was the last time you were in confession?” “Never Father, I’m Jewish.” “So then, why are you telling me?” “I’m telling everybody!”
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has 78.16 % from 391 votes. More jokes about: age, dirty, jewish, old people, priest
I told my crush at school, "If you love me, come wearing red tomorrow." The next day she came in wearing black! When she dropped her pen and she bent over to pick it up, I got a look up her skirt at her red thong. Moral of the story: she really loves me underneath it all.
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has 82.52 % from 1193 votes. More jokes about: dirty, love
I knew I was gonna get along with my mother's boyfriend just fine. Cause when we met, I said to him "Hi Mr. Bob, How are you doing?" He said: "Oh you don't have to Mr. Bob me, just call me motherfucker".
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has 64.54 % from 117 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Q: Why don't witches wear underwear? A: For a better grip on there broomstick!
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has 60.80 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A man walks into a bar and says loudly, "Bartender, six shots!" The bartender looks at him and says, "Wow six shots, whats the occasion?" The man replies , "First bl*wjob!" The bartender then pours him a seventh shot and says, "Congrats man, this ones on me." The man then says , "Man if six shots cant get the taste out of my mouth I don't know what will!"
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has 82.37 % from 236 votes. More jokes about: dirty
What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? Make choking noises...
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has 57.81 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Teacher: And therefore, sperm cells are made up of glucose. Student: So you're saying that sperm has sugar in it? Teacher: Technically. Yes. Student: But it doesn't even taste like that... Teacher: what? Student: what?
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has 83.16 % from 1251 votes. More jokes about: dirty, student, teacher
Alfie was listening to his sister practice her singing. "Sis," he said, "I wish you'd sing Christmas carols." "Thats nice of you, Alfie," she replied, "but why?" Alfie replied, "Because then I'd only have to hear your voice once a year!"
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has 60.21 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, dirty, music
Little cowboy runs into a Bar shouting angerly "WHO's the lousy varmint that painted my horse green?" A big cowboy sidles up to him and says "I DID.. want to complain to me?" "No," says the little guy "just wanted you to know that the first coat is dry!"
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has 58.26 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: bar, cowboy, dirty, disgusting, horse