Joke #1913

Why do moths fly with their legs open? Cause they've got huge mothballs!
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has 19.47 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal

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What do you call a person in china who doesn't eat dog? A tourist.
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has 67.64 % from 170 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, food, racist
"May I buy half a rabbit?" "No, we don't split hares."
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has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
“Mister, why doesn’t this cow have any horns?” asked the young lady from a nearby city. The farmer cocked his head for a moment, then began in a patient tone, “Well, ma’am, cattle can do a powerful lot of damage with horns. Sometimes we keep’em trimmed down with a hacksaw. Other times we can fix up the young ‘uns by puttin’ a couple drops of acid where their horns would grow in, and that stops ‘em cold. Still, there are some breeds of cattle that never grow horns.But the reason this cow don’t have no horns, ma’am, is ’cause it’s a horse.”
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has 80.87 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: animal
Animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.
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has 31.56 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
Late one night, a burglar broke into a house that he thought was empty. He tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a loud voice say: "Jesus is watching you!" Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward again. "Jesus is watching you," the voice boomed again. The burglar stopped again. He was frightened. Frantically, he looked all around. In a dark corner, he spotted a bird cage and in the cage was a parrot. The burglar breathed a sigh of relief, then he asked the parrot: "What's your name?" "Clarence," said the bird. "That's a dumb name for a parrot," sneered the burglar. "What idiot named you Clarence?" The parrot said, "The same idiot who named the Rottweiller, Jesus."
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has 78.14 % from 189 votes. More jokes about: animal, parrot
What did one skunk say to another? And so do you.
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
George was taking care of a parrot for his aunt. This parrot was a very nasty parrot. It cussed and screamed and made fun of George, so he took the parrot and put it in the freezer. The parrot kept screaming and insulting George until finally it stopped. George thought to himself, “On no! I froze my aunt’s bird to death.” He opened the door and saw the bird alive! The bird said, “I’m sorry for my behaviour and will never act up again. George said, “Why the change?” The bird answered, “Because I saw what you did to the other bird."
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has 38.22 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, death, parrot
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
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has 74.36 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, husband, men, time
Did you hear about the snobby cow? She thought she was a cutlet above the rest.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
How do you know when you re eating rabbit stew? When it has hares in it.
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, food