Joke #2135

A husband said to his wife, "No, I don't hate your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law better than I like mine."
Vote:
has 54.57 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: marriage

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A housewife buys a parrot to keep her company during the day. The clerk warns that the parrot was donated by a brothel, where he may have picked up some colorful language. The housewife doesn't mind and brings the parrot home. When she uncovers the cage, the parrot says, "Brawkk! New Madam. Hello Madam." When her three daughters come home from school, the parrot says, "Brawkk! New Girls. Hello Girls." Finally, her husband, Phil, comes home from work, just in time for dinner. When he walks past the parrot, the parrot says, "Brawkk! Hi Phil!"
Vote:
has 58.53 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: marriage, parrot
Miss DeAngelo was a not-too-bright young woman who had moved to Hollywood with dreams of becoming a star. She didn’t find fame or glory, but she did encounter plenty of men willing to enjoy her plentiful charms, and soon she found herself called to testify in a divorce case. When it was her turn on the stand, the lawyer came forward. "Miss DeAngelo, the wife of the defendant has identified you as the ‘other woman’ in her husband’s life. Now, do you admit that you went to the Pricerite Motel with this Mr. Evans?" "Well, yes," acknowledged Miss DeAngelo with a sniff, "but I couldn’t help it." "Couldn’t help it?" asked the lawyer derisively. "How’s that?" "Mr. Evans deceived me." "Exactly what do you mean?" "See, when we signed in," she explained, "he told the motel clerk I was his wife."
Vote:
has 57.27 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, divorce, marriage, wife, women
What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A widow.
Vote:
has 83.19 % from 214 votes. More jokes about: marriage
A college math professor and his wife are both 60 years old. One evening the wife comes home and finds a note from her husband. It says: "My dear, now that you are 60 years old, there are some things you no longer do for me. I am at the Holiday Inn with my 20-year-old student. Don't bother waiting up for me." He returns home late that night to find a note from his wife: "You, my dear, are also 60 years old and there are also things I need that you're not giving me. So, I am at the Motel 6 with one of your 20-year-old students. Being a math professor, I'm sure you know that 20 goes into 60 way more than 60 goes into 20. So, don't YOU wait up for ME."
Vote:
has 51.87 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: age, college, marriage, math, wife
Why do couples hold hands during their wedding day? simple it is just a formality like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!!
Vote:
has 51.69 % from 281 votes. More jokes about: marriage, wedding
A young woman was taking an afternoon nap. After she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's Day. "What do you think it means?" "You'll know tonight," he said. That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it, only to find a book entitled "The Meaning of Dreams."
Vote:
has 58.88 % from 299 votes. More jokes about: marriage, romantic, Valentines day
“A happy marriage is nothing but a give and take relationship; the husband gives and the wife takes.”
Vote:
has 77.25 % from 279 votes. More jokes about: husband, marriage, relationship, wife
While inspecting their honeymoon suite, the bride discovers a little box attached to the bed. "What's this for?" she asks her husband. "If you put a quarter in," he says, reaching into his pocket, "the bed starts vibrating." "Save your money," she says. "When you're a quarter in, I start vibrating."
Vote:
has 82.37 % from 350 votes. More jokes about: holiday, husband, marriage
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted." Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
Vote:
has 85.82 % from 2221 votes. More jokes about: marriage, wife
Men and women can be friends without any sex involved. It's called marriage.
Vote:
has 74.36 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: marriage, sex