The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing – and then they marry him.
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Marrying a man for his good looks is like buying a house for its paint.
Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.
When a married man says "I'll think about it", what he really means is that he doesn't know his wife's opinion yet.
One day Sven walks into the local pub and announces, "Well boys Svens is getting married."
As you can imagine all of Sven's' friends were very happy for Sven's good fortune and they asked, "Who's the lucky girl?"
Sven replied, "Well I am a marrying Madge."
Well, this upset all of Sven's friends because Madge was nothing but a slut, and they all cried.
"Sven you can't marry Madge, she's not a nice girl!"
"Sven replied, "Oh ya, Sven's in love and he's a getting married."
And his friends persisted, "Sven, Madge is a woman of low morals."
Sven just grinned and replied, "Oh ya ya ya, but I love Madge."
Finally, his friends had enough and in unison cried out, "But Sven, Madge has been screwed by every man in town!"
"Oh ya ya ya," said Sven, "But it's not that big of a town."
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say.
After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.
Happy Valentine's Day.
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“A happy marriage is nothing but a give and take relationship; the husband gives and the wife takes.”
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When I got home last night my wife demanded that I 'take her somewhere expensive'...
I took her to a petrol station...
A little boy says, ‘Dad, I’ve heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn’t know his wife until he marries her.’ ‘Son,’ says the dad.
‘That happens everywhere.’
HOW did an Intelligent BOY PROPOSE to a Girl.
He TOOK the Girl ALONG with him on a BOAT & in the MIDDLE of River said: "LOVE ME or LEAVE the BOAT."