Joke #2285

What's green with bumps? A frog with the measles!
Vote: has 11.06 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Customer: "Waiter, there’s a fly swimming in my soup." Waiter: "So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?"
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food
This guy walks into a bar with his golden retriever. "Hey, can I get a drink on the house if my dog talks for you?" "Dogs can't talk, pal. But if you can prove to me yours does, I'll give you a drink. If not, I get to punch you in the nose." "Okay," says the guy. He turns to his dog. "Okay fella. Tell me -- what is on top of your doghouse?" "Roof!" The man turns and smiles at the bartender. "THAT ain't talking! Any dog can bark!" "Okay boy. Tell me -- how does sandpaper feel?" "Ruff!" "What are you tryin' to pull, mister?" "Okay, okay," says the man. "One more question please. Okay buddy, tell me -- who is the greatest ball player who ever lived?" "Ruth." The bartender beats the heck out of the guy and throws him onto the sidewalk outside of the bar, then throws the dog out next to him. The dog stands up and looks at the guy. "Geez. D'ya think I shoulda said DiMaggio?"
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, bar, bartender, dog
Does running out of a burning barn make a cow unusual? No, only medium rare.
Vote: has 52.18 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food
If a hungry shark is after you, what should you feed it? Jawbreakers.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food
What happened to the cannibal lion? He had to swallow his pride!
Vote: has 81.28 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Why did the gag-writer turn green? Cause the gag-writer was sick of writing frog jokes!
Vote: has 29.01 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
What's the difference between an old cat and a baby kitten? An old cat scratches and bites but a little pussy never hurt anybody!
Vote: has 26.98 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, animal, cat, kitty
How about we spank each other and call ourselves even?
Vote: has 18.30 % from 4 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
What do you call a cow on the barnyard floor? Ground Beef.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
What do cows sing at their friends birthday parties? "Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo."
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, birthday, music