What happens when you mix a frog with a bathtub scrubby-mit?
A rubbit!
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Question: Why did the Army send do many women with PMS to the Persian Gulf?
Answer: They fought like animals and retained water for 4 days.
Why was the horseman fired from his job of saddle testing?
He was always standing up on the job!
Chuck Norris is the reason why This Little Piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home.
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A hippo once told me he hated gangs, but then he joined one
What a HippoCrip.
Two deer hunters were not having any luck so they asked for advice from an old-timer.
"You can just about guarantee a deer if you learn to hunt with dogs," he said.
The two hunters got a trained deer dog and hit the woods.
At the end of the day and still empty-handed, one hunter said to the other, "Maybe tomorrow we'll get one if we throw the dog out of a higher treestand."
One day Jane met Tarzan in the jungle. She was very attracted
to him and during her questions about his life she asked him
how he managed for sex.
"What's that?" he asked.
She explained to him what sex was and he said, "Oh, I use a
hole in the trunk of a tree."
Horrified, she said, "Tarzan, you have it all wrong. I'll
show you how to do it properly."
She took off her clothes,
laid down on the ground and spread her legs wide.
"Here," she
said, "You must put it in here."
Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her
an almighty kick, right in the crotch.
Jane rolled around in agony.
Eventually she managed to gasp,
"What the hell did you do that for?"
"Checking for bees!" said Tarzan.
What do you call a cow on the barnyard floor?
Ground Beef.
What do cows do for entertainment?
They go to the mooooovies.
How do you start a teddy bear race?
Ready, teddy, go.