Joke #2411

Who is little, black and jumps? A flee! But who’s big, black and jumps? Dr. Alban!
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has 19.78 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: dirty

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Once upon a time, there was a king who thought that his officers were going to try to have sex with his queen. So he made all of his officers put on tight pants and told them that if anyone got a boner their head would be chopped off. So he lined them up and the queen came to the first one and took off her gown. He got a boner, so that was the end of him. Then she came to the next one and took off her gown, he got a boner and that was the end of him. This went on until she came to the last one and took off gown, then her underthings and he didn't get a boner. So she took off his clothes and started rolling on the floor with him, half an hour went by, then an hour, finally after two hours the king came in to see what was happening and as soon as the king came in the guy got a boner.
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has 73.96 % from 247 votes. More jokes about: dirty, gay, sex
Roses are red lemons are sour. Open your legs and give me an hour.
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has 63.05 % from 115 votes. More jokes about: dirty, food, poems, sex, time
Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when I saw her kill a butterfly. So to teach her a lesson I said, "Just for that you don't get any butter for a month." Today in the kitchen she killed a cockroach. I said, "Nice try."
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has 62.55 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, sex
Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and values. Stuart said, "I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?" Leroy replied, "I'm not sure, what was her maiden name?
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has 75.33 % from 116 votes. More jokes about: dirty, family, marriage, sex, wife
Steve and his buddies were hanging out and planning an upcoming fishing trip. Unfortunately, he had to tell them that he couldn't go this time because his wife wouldn't let him. After a lot of teasing and name calling, Steve headed home frustrated. The following week when Steve's buddies arrived at the lake to set up camp, they were shocked to see Steve. He was already sitting at the campground with a cold beer, swag rolled out, fishing rod in hand, and a camp fire glowing. "How did you talk your missus into letting you go Steve?" "I didn't have to," Steve replied. "Yesterday, when I left work, I went home and slumped down in my chair with a beer to drown my sorrows because I couldn't go fishing. Then the ol' lady Snuck up behind me and covered my eyes and said, 'Surprise'. When I peeled her hands back, she was standing there in a beautiful see through negligee and she said, 'Carry me into the bedroom, tie me to the bed and you can do whatever you want,' So, Here I am!"
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has 85.23 % from 1005 votes. More jokes about: beer, dirty, fish, sex, wife
Two gays were at a dance. As they were jigging about the floor with each other. Two massive guys entered the hall 6 foot 6 20 stone and full of muscle One gay asked his mate "Is that the bouncers that have just come in?" "No" grinned the other,"That's the raffle."
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: dirty, gay, men, party
What is the difference between a joystick and a man's d**k? A joystick does its job.
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has 43.44 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex
Q: What do you get if you cross a dirty politician with a filthy womanizer? A: Chelsea.
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has 73.44 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, political, soccer, sport
Yo mama so fat when you have sex with her you have to slap her stomach and ride the wave in.
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has 53.78 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: dirty, fat, sex, vulgar, Yo mama
Teacher: "Who can tell a story?" Little Johnny: "Our maid's ass." Teacher: "Why?" Little Johnny: "Last night daddy touched her ass and was whispering: 'A wonderful story.'"
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has 69.46 % from 137 votes. More jokes about: dad, dirty, little Johnny, teacher, vulgar