Joke #2440

When do boys ask for a girl’s hand? When they get bored by theirs!
Vote:
has 76.86 % from 279 votes. More jokes about: dirty

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Monica is at the dentist. Half of her mouth is locked due to anesthesia, the dentist is intensively working. Monica's mobile phone starts ringing. Ignoring it four times, the dentist finally answers the phone pissed: What’s up? What’s up?, - some man asks. Dentist: Who are you? I’m Monica’s husband Dentist: Listen, man, I’m about to finish, she will spit it out and will call you back!!!
Vote:
has 82.40 % from 338 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A man is on a plane. The pilot starts talking on the intercom and then lays it down without knowing its still on. The pilot says to the co-pilot, "I could use two things right now, a cup of coffee and a blowjob." Stuartist runs up the isle to tell the pilot to turn off the intercom. The man stands up and says, "Hey hun, dont forget the coffee."
Vote:
has 75.20 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: dirty
The parish priest needs his house painted so he offers the job to one of his altar boys. The first day the kid paints the entire inside of the house, he’s sweating like hell but eventually gets it finished. The priest commends him on the work and with a flourish hands him a £5.00 note. The boy looks at the money and says to the priest, "Thanks very much Father,...you’re a virgin." The priest is a bit startled but makes no remark. The next day the boy has to paint the outside of the house; it’s a really hot day and he just manages to finish the job without collapsing. The priest looks at the job and this time gives the lad another £5.00 note. Once again the lad looks at the money and says, "Thanks very much Father, you really are a virgin." At this stage the priest decides to take action. "Tommy," he says, "that’s twice you’ve called me a virgin. Do you have any idea what the word means?" "Yes," says the kid, "a tight cunt."
Vote:
has 78.04 % from 131 votes. More jokes about: dirty, kids, money, priest, work
Have you ever seen the serial number on a condom? No? Oh sorry, you must not have to roll it down that far.
Vote:
has 73.94 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: dirty, insulting, sex
A little while later Johnny's dad hears a commotion coming from Johnny's bedroom, he rushes in and is horrified to see Johnny shagging his gran! Johnny just looks at him and says "not so funny when its your mum is it ?"
Vote:
has 68.72 % from 130 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Your mama is so stupid, when she lost her dildo she called the cops to look for it.
Vote:
has 41.18 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: cop, dirty, sex, stupid, Yo mama
A crazy man jumps from the bushes and opens his coat in front of an old lady to surprise and terrify her. The granny takes a look at him and sais: "oh, dash, I´ve forgotten to buy the eggs."
Vote:
has 66.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: dirty, memory, old people
Vaginas are like weather, when it's wet, it's time to go inside.
Vote:
has 78.19 % from 1910 votes. More jokes about: dirty, time, weather
Q: What's the best part about gardening? A: Getting down and dirty with your hoes.
Vote:
has 60.73 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: dirty, work
Why Chocolate Is Better Than Sex: - You can GET chocolate. - Chocolate satisfies even when it's gone soft. - You can safely have chocolate while you are driving. - You can have chocolate in in public. - If you bite the nuts, the chocolate won't mind. - The word "commitment" doesn't scare off chocolate. - You don't get hairs in your mouth with chocolate. - No need to fake your enjoyment of chocolate. - Chocolate doesn't make you pregnant. - You can have chocolate at any time of the month. - You are never too young or too old for chocolate. - Size doesn't matter - though more is still better.
Vote:
has 74.10 % from 193 votes. More jokes about: chocolate, dirty, sex