Joke #2515

Two crocks rest on the basin of a zoo talking: Yesterday, the caretaker cursed me, said the older one. What did you do? Asks the other. - I’ve swallowed him...

A game warden was driving down the road when he came upon a boy carrying a wild turkey under his arm. He stopped and asked the boy, "Where did you get that turkey?" The boy replied, "What turkey?" The game warden said, "That turkey you're carrying under your arm." The boy looks down and said, "Well, lookee here, a turkey done roosted under my arm!" The game warden said, "Now look, you know turkey season is closed, so whatever you do to that turkey, I'm going to do to you. If you break his leg, I'm gonna break your leg. If you break his wing, I'll break your arm. Whatever you do to him, I'll do to you. So, what are you gonna do with him?" The little boy said, "I guess I'll just kiss his ass and let him go!"

What did the dog say to the hot dog bun? "Are you pure bred?"

Pavlov walks into a bar. The phone rings, and he says, "Damn, I forgot to feed the dog."

Chuck Norris doesn't just bring home the bacon, he brings home the whole pig.

What are the most athletic rodents? Track and field mice.

Why did the dolphin feel crabby? Because he ate too many crabs.

The man comes home drunken but he goes to the piggery instead of the house. He lies down, he takes a look at the pig, caresses it and says: "Oh, it's you, darling, naked again?"

Chuck Norris can stick his hand inside a rabbit's mouth and pull out a HAT!

Q. What's green and red? A. A very mad frog.

This little kid is walking up the street with his Daddy. They see two dogs going at it. The little kid says "Hey daddy what are those doggies doing?" The father says "Ahh, they're making a puppy." That night the little kid walks in on his mother & father and daddy's on top driving it home to mama! The little kid says "Hey daddy what were you doing with Mommy?" He says "Oh, were making it a baby." The kid say "Turn her over, I want a puppy!"