Q: What did the dad buffalo say to his son on the first day of school? A: Bison.
How could the dolphin afford to buy a house? He prawned everything.
Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog, Skipper, had recently died. "You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad. Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God." Susie stopped crying and asked, "What would God want with a dead dog?"
Yo' Mama is so poor, when she goes to the park, the pigeons throw her bread.
Jesse starts wailing to the vet, "you gotta save my dog, he looks real bad - please you just gotta!" "There, there Jesse, your dog just has a broken hip he'll be fine in no time. My fee, of course, will be $1,500." Jesse starts to wail - "oh, my dog's going to die!!!"
A guy was walking along the street when he saw a crowd of people running towards him. He stopped one of the runners and asked, "What’s happening?" The runner replied breathlessly, "A lion has escaped from the zoo." "Oh my, which way is it heading?" "Well you don’t think we are chasing it, do you?"
Why was the little bear so spoiled? Because its mother panda d to its every whim.
What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding day? A forty-carrot wedding ring.
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
What do you get if you cross a hippo, elephant and a rhino? A Helephino!!
What do you call an easy-going rabbit? Hoppy-go-lucky.