Twenty teams in the league and you are in the last place?
Well, it could have been worse.
How?
There could have been more teams in the league!
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Q: Where is the first tennis match mentioned in the Bible?
A: When Joseph served in Pharaoh's court.
On the ninth day, God said, "Let there be soccer."
And it was good.
Later on that day, God said, "Let there be one team to rule the others and set the standard for excellence."
God said, "Let it be called the Manchester United."
Later that day, God said, "Even Man U needs idiots." So HE made their fans.
Your mama so fat, that she can use herself as a bowling ball and get 10 strikes in all of the lanes!
Micheal Jordan to Chuck Norris:
I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours.
Can you?
Chuck Norris: (laughs) How do you think the earth spins?
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Golfer: "Well caddy, do you like my game?"
Caddy: "Very good, sir! But personally I prefer golf."
What does tightrope walking and getting a blowjob from Grandma have in common?
You don't look down.
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Why did the man keep doing the backstroke?
He’d just had lunch and didn’t want to swim on a full stomach!
Two guys on a double bike where pedaling up a hill.
It took forever to get to the top.
When they finally got to the top the first guy said in a pant, "Whew, that was so hard."
The second replied, "If I hadn't been pushing the brakes the whole time we would have rolled down backwards."
While vacationing in France, Chuck Norris went out for a casual bike ride and accidentally won the Tour de France.
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