Joke #2689

There were once 3 blondes stranded on a deserted island, and could not think of a way to get off it. One of them tripped over what happened to be a magic lamp. Dusting it off, the genie came out. "I will grant you each a wish," he said. "Why not," thought the blondes. "It's worth a try." "I want to be the world's best swimmer," one said, "so I can swim off of the island". She then jumped in to the ocean and swam away. "I want to be a bird," one said, and flew away immediately. The third and last blonde thought for a while. "I want to be a man." She was instantly transformed into a man, and she walked over the bridge to the mainland.
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One day a blonde is sitting on a plane next to one of those annoying, pushy businessmen. He asks her if she would like to play a game. She politely declines, but the man explains the game to her anyway. He says, "It goes like this: I will ask you a question and if you get it wrong you will give me $5, and vice-versa." She says no again, and tries to fall asleep. The man tries harder, saying, "Aw, come on. I'll give you $50 for each question. Or how about $500?" At that number, the blonde agrees. The businessman explains again, "If you get my question wrong you give me $5. And when you ask the question, and I get it wrong, I will pay you $500. "Got it," she replies. He asks, "Who was the sixth president?" She admits she doesn't know and gives him $5. Now it's her turn, and she says, "What has purple legs, five arms and only two yellow teeth?" The businessman doesn't know - he uses his laptop, checks the Internet, e-mails his friends. No one knows the answer. So he gives her $500.00. Then, as they're landing he asks her, "What was that thing anyway?" She thinks a few minutes, hands him $5 and walks off the plane.
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Q: Why was the blonde late for work? A: She was stranded on the broken escalator.
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A truck was traveling through town. When the driver stopped at a red light, A blonde jumped out of her car, ran up to the driver of the truck, and said, "Mr. you're losing part of your load". She jumps back into her car and follows the truck to the next light. She jumps out of car and runs up to the driver's window, "Mr. you're losing part of your load." The same thing happens for 7 stops, finally the 8th stop, the blonde came running up to the truck driver's window, before she could say anything, the driver said, "MA'AM, THIS IS WINTER IN MAINE, I'M DRIVING A SALT TRUCK......."
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How can you tell if a blonde sends you a fax? It has a stamp on it.
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A blonde is driving down the road and she sees a dead rabbit. She stops the car and called out, "Does anybody got any hairspray!?" A man pulls up and gives her a bottle of spray and she sprays it on the dead rabbit and the man stares and says "Why u doing that?" The blonde says "Hairspray is for dead hairs"
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Q: Why did the blonde want to become a veterinarian?  A: She liked kids...
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Q. Did you hear about the blonde lesbian? A. She kept having affairs with men!
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A girl came skipping home from school one day. "Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6,7, 8, 9, 10!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?" "Yes, it's because you're blonde," her mother replied. The next day, the girl came skipping home from school. "Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were saying the alphabet today, and all the other kids could only say it to D, but I said it to G. See? A, B, C, D, E, F, G!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?" "Yes, pumpkin, it's because you're blonde." The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were in gym class today, and when we showered, all the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!" And she lifted her tank top to reveal a pair of 36Cs. "Very good," said her embarrassed mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, mommy?" "No, it's because you're 25."
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What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? Last year’s hide and seek champ.
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A blonde and a brunette are skydiving. The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord and nothing happens. She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing. The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells, "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
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