My previous girlfriend had this weird sleeping disorder - in the middle of every night she would wake up and suck my dick.
No wonder her dad did not want her to move out.
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A Serb and an Albanian from Kosovo found a lamp, rubbed it and the Ginnie showed up in front of them.
"I will grant you three wishes for setting me free out of this lamp. But, since there are two of you, one can have two wishes and the other only one".
A Serb said: "I am very modest, I'll have one wish. Let my Albanian friend have two".
"What is your first wish?", the Ginnie asked Albanian.
"I wish that there are no Serbs in Kosovo at all any more".
"Done", said the Ginnie.
" What is your second wish?"
"I wish that whole of Kosovo is surrounded with high wall, so no more Serbs can return ever again".
" Done", said the Ginnie.
"Now you", sad the Ginnie to a Serb, "What is that you wish?".
A Serb was thinking for a moment, than asked the Ginnie: "Are there realy no more Serbs in Kosovo at all?".
"That's right", said the Ginnie.
"And whole of Kosovo is surrounded with high wall?", a Serb asked again.
"It certainly is. All around. Not even a fly could enter it now", the Ginnie replied.
Then Serb said: "OK, now fill it up with water""
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A reporter was interviewing a 104 year-old woman:
"And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked.
She simply replied, "No peer pressure."
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Joke has 81.86 % from 121 votes. More jokes about: age, black humor, communication, death, old people
Why is there always hot water at childbirth?
In case of a stillbirth, soup.
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Q: What is brown, small, and smells of caramel?
A: A diabetic who's been struck by lightning.
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What's better than 10 dead babies in 1 bag?
1 dead baby in 10 bags.
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How many dead babies does it take to change a tire?
Two, one to prop up the car and one to replace it incase it explodes.
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Every night while Dave is having dinner his wife Natalie goes to the bedroom turns off the light and makes out with Daves friend Andy by the window.
After some days Dave had doubt and leaving supper he went to the dark room only to hear whispers from the other side of the window.
He pushes Natalie away goes near the window,unties his pant and put his arse facing the window.
After a minute Andy puts a kiss on his butt cheek and says "Natalie, haven't u brushed ur teeth today?"
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Q: Why aren't there more famous skeletons?
A: They're a bunch of no bodies!
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Me and my wife decided that we don't want to have children anymore.
So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring you one.
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Q: What do you call a 100 lack people in the ocean?
A: An oil spill
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