Joke #2747

My previous girlfriend had this weird sleeping disorder - in the middle of every night she would wake up and suck my dick. No wonder her dad did not want her to move out.
Vote: has 65.42 % from 133 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Q: Did you hear her eyes were blue? A: Yeah, one blew this way, one blew that way...
Vote: has 62.50 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
Q: What do you do when you see a black man with half a face? A: Stop laughing and reload.
Vote: has 25.45 % from 64 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
Two foreign immigrants have just arrived in the United States by boat and one says to the other, "I hear that the people of this country actually eat dogs." "Odd," her companion replies, "but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do." Nodding emphatically, one of the immigrants points to a hot dog vendor and they both walk toward the cart. "Two dogs, please," she says. The vendor is only too pleased to oblige, wraps both hot dogs in foil and hands them over the counter. Excited, the companions hurry to a bench and begin to unwrap their "dogs." One of them opens the foil and begins to blush. Staring at it for a moment, she turns to her friend and whispers cautiously, "What part did you get?"
Vote: has 84.30 % from 215 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
Good News: A busload of lawyers ran off a cliff. The bus was destroyed and there were no survivors. Bad News: There were three empty seats.
Vote: has 59.20 % from 48 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, car, lawyer
There was an Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman working on the top of a cliff. The Englishman said, "If I have cheese in my sandwich tomorrow, I'll jump off this cliff." The Scotsman said, "If I have jam in my sandwich tomorrow, I'll jump off the cliff." The Irishman said, "If I have ham tomorrow, I'll jump off the cliff." The next day, the Englishman had cheese, the Irishman had ham, and the Scotsman had jam. So they all jumped. At the funerals, the wives of the Scotsman and Englishman said, "Why didn't they just tell us they didn't like their sandwiches?" The Irish lady said, "I don't know why my husband jumped off the cliff. He made his own sandwiches."
Vote: has 72.24 % from 123 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, funeral, husband, racist, wife
A cab driver reaches the pearly gates. St. Peter looks him up in his Big Book and tells him to pick up a gold staff and a silk robe and proceed into Heaven. Next in line is a preacher. St. Peter looks him up in his Big Book, furrows his brow and says, "OK, we'll let you in, but take that cloth robe and wooden staff." The preacher is shocked and replies, "But I am a man of the cloth. You gave that cab driver a gold staff and a silk robe. Surely I rate higher than a cabbie!" St. Peter responds matter-of-factly, "This is Heaven and up here, we are interested in results. When you preached, people slept. When the cabbie drove his taxi, people prayed."
Vote: has 85.07 % from 779 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, car, heaven, work
A very old woman realizes that she's seen and done everything and the time has come to depart from this world. After considering various methods of doing away with herself, she decides to shoot herself through the heart. Not wanting to make a mistake, she phones her doctor and asks him the exact location of the heart. He tells her that the heart is located two inches below the left nipple. The old woman hangs up the phone, takes careful aim and shoots herself in the left knee.
Vote: has 79.73 % from 221 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, doctor, old people, phone
First Cannibal: "Have you seen the dentist?" Second Cannibal: "Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time."
Vote: has 72.71 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, doctor, food
I bet my friend $5 that he would drown in the lake. A bittersweet victory.
Vote: has 67.68 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, money
The worst place to have a heart attack is during a gama of cherades. ...Especially if the people you are playing with, are really bad guessers.
Vote: has 65.19 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor