Joke #2761

I saw a man with one arm shopping in a second hand store. I thought "You are never going to find here what you are looking for"...
Vote: has 76.51 % from 127 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson
Vote: has 58.58 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, black humor, celebrity, kids
A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island. After one month the woman says: "I can not proceed in this way." And she suicides herself. After another month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they bury the woman. The next month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they dig up the woman.
Vote: has 56.35 % from 86 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, desert island, morbid, navy, sex
Lifting weights have really helped me with the ladies - the last five I raped didn't stand a chance.
Vote: has 26.83 % from 39 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
This old man and woman were on a cruise and it was really stormy. They were standing on the back of the boat watching the moon when a wave came up and washed the old woman overboard. They searched for days and couldn't find her so the captain sent the old man back to shore with the promise that he would notify him as soon as they found something. Three weeks went by and finally the old man got a fax from the boat it read: "Sir, sorry to inform you, we found your wife dead at the bottom of the ocean. We hauled her up to the deck and attached to her very most private part was an oyster and inside it was a pearl worth $50,000 ...please advise." So the old man faxed back: "Send me the pearl and re-bait the trap..."
Vote: has 71.14 % from 157 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, old people, wife
Q: What do the Jews hate most about the Holocaust? A: The cost.
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, jewish, money
Why was the cannibal looking peeky? Because he had just eaten a Chinese dog!
Vote: has 68.45 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, black humor, dog, food
While examining the the body of Mr. Schwartz, a mortician notices that Schwartz has the largest penis he has ever seen. "I'm sorry, Mr. Schwartz," says the mortician, "But I can't send you to be cremated with a tremendously huge penis like this. It has to be saved for posterity." The mortician removes the penis, places it in a jar and puts the jar in his briefcase. When he gets home, he decides to show it to his wife. "I have something to show you that you won't believe," he says, removing the jar from his briefcase. "Oh my God!" she screams, "Schwartz is dead!"
Vote: has 85.48 % from 934 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, god, wife
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
Vote: has 86.61 % from 253 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
What's pink and spits? A baby in a frying pan.
Vote: has 22.36 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
Q: What's the fastest way to a man's heart? A: With a knife.
Vote: has 59.75 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor